Published On:Monday, May 19, 2014
Posted by Unknown
Can you be friends with your Ex?
Mumbai: When relationships end, it is bound to hurt feelings or bring out a feeling of uneasiness and anger. Right after your break up has taken place and give yourself enough time to understand what exactly happened.
Once things fall in place, being friends with your Ex can still be a preferable option. Listed below are some of the ways to continue being friends with him or her:
Let healing happen first
If you have a lot of bitterness or negative feelings about your spouse, it's too soon to try to be friends. Get rid of mementos from your relationship, and avoid places or situations that remind you of him or her. This will help you move on. Once you feel firmly on your feet, you can try getting back in touch.
Don't play the blame game
Leave your past issues in the past and begin focusing on your friendship. Relationship expert also stated, ‘Most of us don't argue and bicker with our friends so now that your relationship status has changed from romantic relationship to friendship, leave the arguing and bickering out of it.’ To become friends again with the person you once loved, blame the relationship, not the person. This will help you see the person as a good friend and no more feel hurt about your past.
Forgive and set boundaries
While it might seem difficult, when you're ready and you want to stay friends with your ex you'll need to practice forgiveness. Forgiveness is the number one key to remaining friends with your ex, so forgive them and yourself. By just saying "I forgive you" and/or "I'm sorry", both the partners can feel a certain type of psychological relief. Set new physical, emotional and sexual boundaries, which means changing the relationship to purely a platonic one.
If you have children, respect your ex as your child's other parent
“Whether or not you have children, respect your ex as a person you once loved enough to marry no matter how mistaken you might have been,” advises Tessina, a relationship expert.
Be nice to the new beau
It'll be tough, but if your ex has a new girlfriend, be pleasant. “This sends a very reassuring message to your ex and the new partner that you are not going to be a threat,” Orbuch, relationship expert explains. 'You may even find that your Ex welcomes a new friendship between you and his new partner.'
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Best,